Here is a great blog post by a sister in-Christ that gives great guidance to the abused. In my opinion, it has a great top 10 list for real Christian love. Also, the 4 points she makes on finding real love as a Christian is just as good as the top 10. Great wisdom. I love the title of her post too – To get the right one, ya gotta be the right one. Too often we look externally/selfishly at what we want instead of focusing on what God says we need.
Top 10 ways to Christian Love
- Listen without interrupting. (Proverbs 18)
- Speak without accusing. (James 1:19)
- Give without sparing. (Proverbs 21:26)
- Pray without ceasing. (Colossians 1:9)
- Answer without arguing. (Proverbs 17:1)
- Share without pretending. (Ephesians 4:15)
- Enjoy without complaint. (Philippians 2:14)
- Trust without wavering. (Corinthians 13:7)
- Forgive without punishing. (Colossians 3:13)
- Promise without forgetting. (Proverbs 13:12)
#1) Seek a true relationship with Jesus Christ. (Matthew 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you). There is NO relationship that can stand without God at the center of it.
#2) Quit looking! Let God “bring” into your life the one HE has chosen for you. (2 Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?) This does not mean just that they believe in God, even the devil believes in God and trembles because of Him. They also need a true relationship with Jesus Christ. Loving God first and foremost.
#3) Make sure they are of God. Keep in mind the devil knows what you are looking for also. (Matthew 7:16 Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?) Just because someone teaches a Sunday School class or sings in a choir or even confesses to be a christian, doesn’t necessarily mean their heart is right.
#4) Do they reflect the true biblical love of God, not just hearers of the Word but doers also. (James 1:22 But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves.) Keep in mind again, even the devil knows God’s Word but he doesn’t DO IT. Not everyone who calls on the name of the Lord is a christian.