Justification of thought
I give glory to God for all gained knowledge. Earlier in my walk, I always talked about things I have discovered, done, etc. Or things that people have shown me. Now when I look back at some of my earlier posts, it was God doing it all along. “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one
can boast.” Praise the Lord.
After talking with a few folks, who have confirmed via their own thought patterns, it has become obvious that when the flesh battles with the Spirit, the flesh wins when I justify the matter at hand. The Spirit wins when I decide to just be (Ultimate Choice).
The best way to explain how this happens for me is when my soul is sucked into a tennis/ping pong match of thought… PING: The righteous choice and thoughts of the Spirit: “Your body is a temple”. PONG: The bad choice and thoughts coming from the flesh: “It’s ok to do it because <y>” (PING = the Spirit ministering to my soul, PONG = the flesh ministering to my soul). Check out this awesome e-book on Spirit vs Flesh to understand this further. Ultimately, I would have to make the choice. In order to stop the justification, it was necessary to first break free from this ping pong game and become a spectator.
For example, quitting smoking. When I wasn’t a spectator and I was a player of the game, I would see the cigarettes coming at me to play this game. My spirit says that I don’t like to smoke and it doesn’t feel good in my temple. (ping!).. The flesh says that I’m addicted, I like smoking, I’ll just smoke a 1/2 one, I’ll quit one of these days, I’m smoking natural tobacco, etc. (pong!).. This is the ping pong match. When I chose to smoke, the Spirit lost the game and I would be pushing Him to the side, being selfish, choosing the flesh’s desires. When I decided to not play the games any longer and just be, I then stood back as a spectator. I surrendered the self, which allowed the Spirit to explode into focus. So then, I just be.. I don’t play the game, I just be.. watching the thought patterns ping pong back and forth. Analyzing. Seeing what thoughts are what.
For any smoker, these will ring very familiar: “Oh no, i need a cigarette, I’m having a withdrawal. I am addicted. I can’t help it. I’ve done well so far, I’ll just have a couple of puffs. Day 3 is the hardest! I haven’t had one in a week, I’m ok now if I have just 1. I’m stressed, one won’t hurt. I got this beat, now I can smoke one here and there whenever I want..” and so on.. These are just words of justification that are like a vacuum and get us back into the ping pong match. They get us back into playing a game, which is a struggle. If we make the ultimate choice and surrender.. and allow the Spirit to explode into focus, then the game doesn’t exist. It is very simple: I don’t like smoking, so I don’t smoke. Withdrawals, addiction, getting all nervous, eating, etc was part of the ping pong match. The game doesn’t exist when the choice is made to not allow the thoughts of the flesh to materialize. See what they are, they are not of what the Spirit’s desires are…and they were not my desires either. So it was a no brainer… Let the Spirit play the game, be the battle warrior.. I can be in peace…
When I play the games, I sometimes choose to surrender my own desires and let the Spirit’s desires fill me… Thus an automatic choice would take place, and I would be happy/glorious. Sometimes… I would justify the choice, and I would end up in some form of a negative emotion/situation/thought. Then I decided, via help from the Lord through my friend Jim, that thinking of choices on every aspect is just sucking me into trying to do this on my own. I join the battle in my mind, the ping pong match. This takes me away from my special place. I decided to not play the game…so that there is no losing. I made an ultimate choice to just be w/ the Spirit. Just be.
And now, I see a force that wants me to play the game (the thought forming)… a vacuum, sucking me in. I see a ping pong ball coming at me and I don’t pick up the paddle to hit it back. I just step aside, yield, and let those balls keep on passing me (yielding to the thoughts versus engaging them. Once the thoughts are engaged, it’s a struggle to not snowballl them). Without picking up the paddle, I’m winning 100% of the games, as long as I just be. Some times, I fail. But I also recognize almost every time when I picked up the paddle to play (most of the time via justification… some of the time because I wasn’t playing attention), and I will drop the paddle immediately. The next ping pong ball coming into my court just goes on by. I still win.
Thought is a powerful thing. Thinking of thought, analyzing it, watching the formations of thoughts, and making wise choices before the thoughts are into full bloom (yielding/stepping aside from them ahead of time) are the things that have helped me to begin to move away from justifications. Once a thought of the flesh is in full bloom within my mind, then the justification game starts and it’s much harder to make the individual choice the Spirit prefers on that specific scenario. Sometimes I recognize the forming of a thought in time, and sometimes I don’t catch it. If I could throttle the speed of my mind down to 5% of normal speed, it would make things easier. If I have learned one thing, is that I use to think way too fast. I thought things were automatic.. I was like on auto-pilot. Once I started to look and analyze how the body, thoughts and emotions interact.. The world opened up.
Praise the Lord for giving me the strength, knowledge and wisdom to see the deceptions.